My son got sent home from school today.

He had been suspended for running around the girls’ toilets with his privates hanging out. Seems he had done it for a bet.

Suspension seemed to be a bit harsh, so I rang the headmaster to explain that it was just a bit of tomfoolery gone too far.

However, he was having none of it and stuck by the suspension.

Getting a bit peeved, I asked him if he would rather have him thieving and smashing the school up like others I could mention.

“No”, he said, “I would rather have him teaching the Year 5 Chemistry class that he is paid to do!”

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