An old man in his eighties stood up from his chair and started putting on his coat.
His wife looked over and asked, “Where are you off to?”
He replied, “I’m going to the doctor to get some of those new Viagra pills.”
Without missing a beat, his wife got up from her rocking chair and started putting on her sweater.
He looked puzzled. “And where are you going?”
She said, “I’m going to the doctor too.”
He asked, “Why?”
She smirked and said, “If you’re planning to use that rusty old thing again, I’m getting a tetanus shot.”
Joke : The Farmer and the Talking Dog
A man was driving through the countryside when he spotted a sign:
"Talking Dog for Sale – $10."
Curious, he stopped at the farmhouse, knocked on the door, and asked the farmer, “Is it true you have a talking dog?”
“Sure do,” the farmer replied. “He’s out back in the barn.”
The man walked into the barn and, to his shock, there was a scruffy old Labrador lying in the hay.
“Can you really talk?” the man asked, half-joking.
“Yep,” the dog replied casually. “Been able to talk my whole life.”
The man’s eyes widened. “This is amazing! What have you done with your life?”
“Well,” said the dog, stretching, “I’ve lived a long one. I helped the police sniff out drugs, I was a therapy dog at a children’s hospital, and once I even overheard a plot against a politician and saved his life. After all that, I settled down here to retire.”
The man rushed back to the farmer, practically shaking. “This dog is incredible! Why on earth are you selling him for only ten bucks?!”
The farmer shrugged.
“’Cause he’s a dang liar. He ain’t done none of that stuff.”