7. My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

8. Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

9. It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker.

10. These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief."

Remember: You don't stop laughing because you grow old, You grow old because you stop laughing.

--- THE SENILITY PRAYER : Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference

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