The Elderly Drover At The Pearly Gates

 

So, I went up to the biggest bloke, tattoos everywhere, and smacked ‘im in the face, kicked ‘is bike over, ripped out ‘is nose-ring, and threw it on the ground.

I yelled, “Now, back off!! Or I’ll kick the crap out of the lot of ya!”

St. Peter was impressed,

“When did this happen?”

“Oh, ‘bout a couple o’ minutes ago.”